This just in.. Jessica Simpson is not hot anymore

I suppose I could talk about the lastest blah blah from Bill Gates toting some new and improved feature/product that will either become the next thing or fade into obscurity. Blogs will clamor to cover it, so if it does take off they were "there when it happened." However, I will spare you my attempts to look cool and nerdy covering a techo-feature today. Does it really matter if you go a day without seeing something about an I-pod? I say no.

Today I would like to talk about Jessica Simpson. She is probably the most overrated celebrity I've seen in a long time. And yet, some people buy her "I'm a dumb bleached blonde" routine. Don't get me wrong, she used to be quite the hottie (evidence). But now her fake fish lips, other cosmetic "enhancements", and country-bumpkin act are really getting tired. Bleh

And then there is Jessica's sister, Ashlee Simpson. Hopefully talent doesn't run in the family. Case in point her ill-fated attempt to lip sync on Saturday night live, don't people remember Milli Vanilli? When the record skips you have a lot of explaining to do. And then the poor kid tried to blame it on her band, so sad. If I was in her band I so would have sold her diary to the enquirer after that crap.

Well since the Saturday night live incident, Ashlee has abandoned her "alternative rocker" routine and now has become a pure imitation of Jessica Simpson. Case in point, how her look has changed: Before After Don't get me wrong, she doesn't look bad, I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers if you know what I mean.

Anyways, back to Jessica. I can think of several nobodies that are hotter. Like this incredibly hot school teacher lady. School teacher lady. Hmm I think some more pictures are warranted. Yeah. She was recently arrested for having "relations" with one of her students. My question is, where the hell was she when I was in high school?

Jessica Simpson, eat your heart out.