The Matrix Online – Why it failed

The Matrix Online was supposed to be one of the best MMORPG's on the market when it was introduced. The premise was simple, become Neo, be the "one", and win the internet. The trouble is, what do you do with 10,000 players who all want to win the internet?

How can you placate them? "Look Johnny, I understand your desire to win the internets, but you must realize that Susie, George, Bob, and Stinklebean over here also want to win the internet." How do you tell 10,000 would be heroes that there are 9,999 other would-be heroes?

Answer: You can't. It would crush the egos of the pasty, sickly pale kids who survive for years without social interaction; their only reason for living being some pending video game accomplishment. You simply can't take that away from them. Just as in the matrix, if the mind dies, the body dies.

There are other problems noted with the game in addition to the above. The characters on the screen had chronic "muppet mouth." In other words, they probably could have done better animation with several cans of tuna and a tube sock. This was highly unrealistic and non-immersive. And frankly, it kinda creeped me out.

Here is an artist's rendition of what playing Matrix online was like: Artist's rendition

I think I've had more fun throwing zip lock bags of rancid greenbeans at oncoming traffic. Fortunately this is no longer our problem. Time Warner sold the rights for Matrix Online to Sony Online Entertainment on June 17, 2005. Now that this tur.. er.. torch has been passed on, other avenues of gaming can be explored.

Note: The Matrix Online, Time Warner, and Sony Online Entertainment are registered trademarks of their respective holders.