Indeed, the pain you are about to experience is the work of none other than portzer #2. In an email sent to me on April 4th, 2007, he directs my attention to new content for the blog. And what he showed me was this monstrosity. I cannot deny him his foul content wishes, because it would hamper creativity. Censorship is a slippery slope. Thus, behold, from the bowels of hades and portzer #2’s own imagination:
Nake fat guy dancing
Looks like Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake are splitting up. Friends close to the couple say it isn’t true. But you know what JT. Dump her! I actually spotted Diaz and Timberlake while on my honeymoon in Maui. At Cheeseburgers in Paradise (yummy burgers and color changing collectors cups!). She denied my wife a picture : (. But I would have done the same if I had not spackled on concealer just 10 minutes previous to the photo. Her skin is all freckly-like and she must have been in the ocean because her eyes were bloodshot. But hey, we would have taken an autograph. I should have snapped the photo anyways, ran out yelling “Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake in Cheeseburgers in Paradise. She’s putting cheese on her head and snorting french fry seasoning”.
So now to who Timberlake is supposedly dating. Mr. Ronco’s daughter, Lauren Popeil. She is the heiress to the Ron Popeil Rotisserie cookin’, egg scramblin, pocket fishin’ fortune. Which I’m sure dwarf’s Timberlake’s singing and acting career earnings combined. Never deny the purchasing power of trailer people. I must admit I have a little trailer person in me too, I like that rotisserie “Set it and Forget it!”.
So go for it Timberlake… For the trailer park person in all of us…